April 2009
65 posts
“Dear god send me love. That’s all. Xoxo. Jc”
– @JuanCubaNation/a>
“Dear drug marketers, No matter how congested I get, Astepro does not sound like...”
– @coquettecutie
“Dear US Air: I cordially request that you go into Chapter 7 as soon as humanly...”
– @babystew
“Dear Ibuprofen: I desire your analgesia always. But it has been days since we...”
– @mgbales
“Dear Lady at Work, Please refrain from your use of camel-toe in the workplace....”
– @GPappalardo
“dear amazon - thanks for letting me down…”
– @seanbohan
“Dear universe, I would really like a new job.”
– @splendorly
“Dear Amazon: You may not charge me for extra shipments, but my asstastic courier...”
– @betobeto
“Dear Apple, I know you hate M$ but do you think you could not do a pop under...”
– @dumbwhore
“dear god. hi. please let me get the job at the adidas store. because i really...”
– @ambsace
“Dear Frontier Airlines: Whichever animal gives shitty service and loses bags,...”
– @thestew
“Dear Gillette: I loathe your commercial for the Quatro Razor w/personal trimmer....”
– @aileen2u2
“Dear Ovaries, Just because we are gorging on pictures of our friend’s new...”
– @ehrow
“Dear God, please let me find a job that pays me at least 30k a year and gives me...”
– @RyanJBlake
“Dear CARROLTON, KENTUCKY, why do you think it’s okay to let your Chevron...”
– @JalynnCleaver
“Dear @nytimes: I don’t want to switch to your global edition. Please stop...”
– @kevinmeyers
“Dear Google: We used to be tight. Then u spelled Scott Baio’s name wrong...”
– @FooFoo_McKinley
“Dear myspace, why would I want to take a Metro Station quiz?”
– @afavoritemelody
“Dear help desk person, please tell me your title next time you call me, instead...”
– @SocialJulio
“Dear Microsoft Entourage, I realize you juggle many tasks, but you really need...”
– @rosecs
“Dear Muslim Radicals Who Want to Blow Up Americans,: This whole war on terror...”
– @AJae
“Dear Jeff(From Diet) It’s been a long time. I miss you. Did you really eat...”
– @jconolly
“Dear Dell: sending my friends netbook 2 weeks ahead of schedule and not sending...”
– @cbellers
“dear God, it’s april. just letting you know in case there aren’t...”
– @evanmarkert
“Dear TWC, why have a PIN number for “verification” if you’re...”
– @tipsle
“Dear Anchor Marketing Director, stalking me with Maude the fictitious Cow does...”
– @_Sus_
“Dear Amazon, Anything that costs enought to be “$450 off” I cannot...”
– @KimberlyStew
“Dear MS: Apple is not a competitor. You make an OS & software. Every Mac is...”
– @panache
“Dear Microosft: Don’t suggest that I connect my flash drive to a USB 2.0...”
– @michaelper22
“Dear March: You were a lousy fucking month. April’s making you look like a...”
– @smuttystett
“Dear Ning: Please devise an iPhone friendly mobile portal to your sites. Thanks.”
– @jameyo
“Dear virgin America when I finally decided to date you - you’re 2 hours...”
– @Net
“Dear spammer, your attempts to invade my inbox only make GMail detection...”
– @davidcarrington
“Dear FreeBSD ports, Please stop shutting down the MySQL service without...”
– @charleshooper
“Dear Twitter, the next 5 months will be a fantastic time to follow me. It seems...”
– @LeeC
“dear everyone I talked to yesterday: if I was being a bitch, I’m...”
– @heybrittani
“Dear shower door installers: a.) the customer is always right. b.) never assume...”
– @primmie
“Dear Apple; why doesn’t the iPhone play mov’s?”
– @liambrazier
“Dear Twitter: If you’re going to market the hell out of yourselves get a...”
– @jamiegrim
“Dear Province: Never EVER run a cover atricle on how the Canucks are hot ever...”
– @musicman2059
“Dear press release writers, this doesn’t make a job fair sound newsworthy:...”
– @lyount
“Dear Co-worker, I’m from Michigan — as long as there’s less...”
– @rethwyll
“Dear Twitter, How are you? I am fine. Today I tried three kinds of milk: soy,...”
– @kibblesmith
“Dear Navy, why must you constantly take men away from their families? Sigh. At...”
– @anniepeterson
“dear dad, so sorry that i popped on your floor. i like you and crystal and...”
– @AnnietheWhippet
“Dear Excel, I hate you. I hate you so much. Stop being such a fucking bastard....”
– @MikeTreat
“Dear Classmates.com you are wasting my valuable time with selling me something...”
– @Genuine
“Dear Captain Picard, I offer up to thee this “Earl Grey Hot” with my...”
– @beccajoojoo
“Dear Panera: Bring back the Fandango Salad!!!!!!!”
– @amybomar
“Dear Obama…you are “dividing this country” what happened to...”
– @RoSiTa08